Male asylum seekers entering Belgium will have to cede prints of their erectile penis. ‘We admit fingerprints are too intrusive, that’s why we’re taking penile prints’, government officials say.
Of the new ‘Reactions’ Facebook has released, the ‘Show me your tits’ button is by far the most popular. ‘This button expresses what 10,000 likes can’t manage,’ men say. ‘It makes life a whole lot easier.’
In the margins of a UN meeting, world leaders have agreed to stop pretending they give a shit about the Palestinians. ‘It was a tough decision, but in the best interest for everyone involved.’
According to a survey carried out by Public Policy Polling, over 60% of the US voters is convinced that the People’s Republic of North Korea does not exist. Kim Jong-un’s regime has reacted with disappointment.
