The European Rightly
May 29th, 2017
⋅ HEADLINES ⋅

Belgium takes penile prints of asylum seekers

Male asylum seekers entering Belgium will have to cede prints of their erectile penis. ‘We admit fingerprints are too intrusive, that’s why we’re taking penile prints’, government officials say.

Men relieved by Facebook’s new ‘Show me your tits’ button

Of the new ‘Reactions’ Facebook has released, the ‘Show me your tits’ button is by far the most popular. ‘This button expresses what 10,000 likes can’t manage,’ men say. ‘It makes life a whole lot easier.’

Archives

tpony
August 9th, 2014

Austerity measures hit history: Trojan Horse downsized to Trojan Pony

History departments have announced budget cuts and cost-saving measures at the annual History Summit in Zürich, Switzerland. Major events, achievements and personalities will be right-sized to fit in better with today’s realities.

Science, Society | 0 Comments | Continue reading ...

The EU Rightly
July 24th, 2014

‘Real Men’ are absolute twats, it has emerged

Researchers from the University of Oxford have recently concluded a three-year study on masculinity. It confirmed their hypothesis that ‘Real Men’ are dimwitted idiots.

Lifestyle, Society, Sport | 0 Comments | Continue reading ...

The EU Rightly
May 9th, 2013

Belgium symptomatic for West’s decline

Egon Spengler has famously claimed the ‘decline of the West’. That prediction has come true through the Eurovision Song Contest: western European countries have atrocious track records, and Belgium’s leading.

Showbizz | 0 Comments | Continue reading ...

The EU Rightly
February 27th, 2013

CERN furious for ‘Large Hardon Collider’

European science organisation CERN is angry. Last month, a German adult movie studio released ‘Large Hardon Collider’, a pornographic spoof on the Large Hadron Collider owned by CERN.

Science | 4 Comments | Continue reading ...